trying to juggle the balls...

...not those kind of balls! get your mind out of the gutter ;p

Trying (in my most zen-like manner) to find a good balance between school, social life and work. Challenging at times...it's kind of a cruel irony that you start to make good friends so that by this point in school when things are kind of peaking, my social calendar also has the most opportunity as well. But very happy to have this 'problem' ;)

I'm having all kinds of interesting stress dreams, too. Have dreamt about somewhat stress-inducing people from my past...dreamt about caterpillars and other bugs (hopefully eventually they will turn into butterflies!)...and just this week dreamt about being pregnant and in labor. Mama mia! I think that in particular was a reminder to check in on my two very pregnant girlfriends, who have both since had very beautiful, healthy baby boys. Welcome to the world Derrick & Lucas!

In some ways I wish I could be stressing about pregnancy...which would infer that I had a very active love life...not really a possible stress at this moment in time. Had a funny thought that maybe I meant to live the life of some kind of sustainable nun. Please God, don't let that be my fate!

My parents think I am crazy. I had a talk with my mom the other day...just saying how I'm really concerned about food security and potential outcomes of the next oil crisis. She tried to point out potential silver linings. At this point, having soaked up all kinds of environmental issues and concerns for the last few months, I'm quite concerned and skeptical that ingenuity or technology will provide for a smooth transition from a society based entirely on oil to one that's weened itself off oil. I talked about how this could potentially be the most prosperous time of humankind. My mom was quick to point out that the people in the roaring 20s probably also felt that way...to which I said, yeah, but they still had oil after the stock market crash, and now we have 6 billion people to feed. (Eventually), without dependency on oil for industrial farming and transportation (and probably other factors I'm forgetting). It's not a fun thing to think about, and not going to get anyone voted into office...

She asked me if I'm depressed.

Then I got an email from my dad. Showing concern and support...saying in 1970 he had a physics teacher that got him all freaked out about ocean pollution and increasing red tides...and that his father told him it was all hogwash.

It's pretty frustrating to feel like a crazy person, too! I mean...I know I'm kind of out in left field here...but someone needs to be. Maybe other people are, and I just need to find them. Band together. Safety in numbers :)

Anywho, all in all school is good. Tonight I need to work on a group presentation all about climate design (we selected zone Af, tropical rainforest, hot/humid - we were asked to select a zone no one had lived in). Also need to crank out some drawings for work. I'm getting a little frustrated with work...I would really love to work on it full time, but it's just not possible right now. And I live with my boss. So last night, for example, I kind of felt like I couldn't go home for dinner unless I had new drawings in hand. So I didn't eat dinner until 1am (though I had a very late lunch and had armed myself with lots of snacks). He liked the drawings, and apparently the client has already responded well to them, too...but I hate that it keeps turning into that. Late night work (where I'm bound to forget something or glance over a typo).

And in my graphic design class today...I felt quite underprepared. At least I had something to talk about and show...but just did not have my ideas organized. And that's probably my favorite class!

Deep breath in...

Need more yoga!

On to it...
cheers!